


Searching For Answers

by Lezzles



Series: Secrets and Answers [2]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Drama, F/M, Gen, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-15
Updated: 2014-07-27
Packaged: 2018-01-04 16:14:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1083048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lezzles/pseuds/Lezzles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As she helps Cassie Fraiser discover more about her mother Janet's secret life from just before her death, Sam Carter makes discoveries about her own life. Realization of hidden feelings forces her to re-evaluate her plans for the future.<br/>Set in the AU universe of my story 'Secrets'.  </p>
<p>Disclaimer - I don't own Stargate SG-1 and it's characters:<br/>They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.<br/>I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this; it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Discovery

**Author's Note:**

> AN:  
> A HUGE thank you to Firestar385 for beta reading, Americanizing and generally correcting this work. Any remaining mistakes are mine!
> 
> Reviews please, I would love to know what you think. All constructive criticism is welcomed - I want to improve and the best way is to take on board other people's comments.
> 
> I hope you will enjoy the reading journey as much as I am enjoying the writing one.

 

* * *

I don't own Stargate SG-1 and its characters:

They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.

I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this;

it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.

* * *

Minor Spoilers for New Order I and New Order II

* * *

...

Sam Carter closed her front door and leaned back against it with a sigh. She felt bone-tired. Had for a while, actually, but only now acknowledged that fact, with the current crisis over and hopefully a lull before the next one!

This one had been bad, and she shuddered to think of the consequences if it hadn't worked out for them. But 'Thank God' it HAD worked out, and so she could finally relax for a while, knowing that all was right with her world. Well, at least as right as it could be, knowing that her father was off God-knows-where, and the closest female friend she had ever had, and probably WOULD ever have, was gone forever. She felt a slow tear track down her face at that particular memory, the pain almost robbing her of her senses. Then, just as suddenly, felt joy engulf her with the knowledge that at least ALL of her other close friends… her family were safe and home again.

If she had permanently lost the Colonel as well, she didn't think she could have coped! The Colonel, or rather  _The General_  she corrected herself, was back to being his usual sarcastic, demanding and childlike self, and she wouldn't have him any other way! The knowledge that O'Neill was back with the SGC was definitely the best analgesic for any pain she felt. A little voice whispered that Pete should be her main source of comfort, but she swiped that thought ruthlessly away. Pete was personal; the SGC was professional and the biggest part of her life. The two things were totally separate!

Now though, she needed some sleep.  _Proper_  sleep, not the artificial sleep conjured for her mind by Fifth in a fantasy-world, she thought with another small shudder! God, she definitely needed sleep, her moods were swinging up and down like a yoyo! Which, of course, brought to mind a certain silver-haired Col… General, and she found she was smiling again…

...

She was walking from the house in which she had awoken before, and found herself being greeted by the same gentle dog, and she suddenly realized she was back in Fifth's fantasy. The stables loomed before her, but suddenly beyond them she caught the shimmer of light on water, and she looked up to see not Pete, but Jack O'Neill sporting a cheeky grin and looking more relaxed than she'd ever seen him. What was Fifth up to now? But NO, she'd escaped from Fifth, hadn't she?

"Sam, are you OK?" She looked at his puzzled face, the deep brown eyes shining with concern, and then swung around as she heard bells ringing from the house. She felt his hand on her arm and heard his voice in her ear, "Sam …" But it was fading away, everything was going dark, and…

Suddenly she shot up and found herself in her own bed, in her own house, feeling disorientated by the fading dream.

' _WHOA… Where did that come from?_ ' Then she realized that the bells were still ringing, or to be more precise the phone by her bed was ringing. Glancing at the clock she discovered she had only been asleep for half an hour.

"Damn, this had better be good," she muttered to herself as she reached for the phone. "Sam Carter."

"Sam! At last! I've been trying to get you for ages!"

"Cassie, what's wrong? I'm sorry I've been away."

"Oh!... And… Did you find anything?" Sam heard the uncertainty and pain in the younger woman's voice and rushed to reassure her.

"We brought the Colonel home, and he's perfectly fine."

"Oh God, I'm SO glad!" The relief was palpable down the phone, but the reaction was subdued, not Cassie's usual exuberant self at all. At one time she would have squealed with glee, but that was before… before she lost her mother… for the  _second_  time.

"He's at home, you should ring him… but NOT tonight!... It's too late."

"It's only 9 o'clock!"

"Well it was a fairly exhausting trip… and we're really tired, Honey."

"Oh, sorry. Did I wake you?"

"It's fine, Honey. I'm always glad to hear from you. Now what can I help you with?"

"It's just… When I was going through Mom's things…." Her voice trailed off and the uncertainty was back there again, making Sam feel guilty.

"I'm sorry, Cass. I should have been there to help you with that."

"No! It's OK. I knew you must have been busy with something important or you would have been, and with Jack missing…" her voice trailed away again.

"I know, and yes I WOULD have been there with you if I could… So, what's wrong?"

"It's just…" she paused again, and Sam cried out for her, hearing the deep pain in her voice.

"Cassie", she said gently. "Just tell me. It can't be that bad."

"It's not bad at all, not really, just that I always thought Mom shared everything of her life, except her work, of course."

"And? Cass?"

"Sorry, it's just that I found some things hidden away in the back of a drawer. New things, I've never seen before… a scarf, some underwear and there was this really beautiful gold bracelet. It's engraved inside… All my love, always. P."

"It was probably something she had from her husband."

"Her husband was called Wayne, and anyway, the box it was in was date stamped… last year's date!"

"Of course he was. Well that is strange. Maybe it was from a patient and Janet was embarrassed about it."

"Mom NEVER took gifts from patients. She emphasized that was the wrong thing to do when I was a volunteer at the hospital."

"I would have thought she would have told me if she was seeing anyone, especially as a gift like that sounds pretty long term."

"Well so would I… and told me as well! I mean, we had the usual mother -daughter squabbles, but I was always telling her she needed someone in her life, and she never said a word. Now I find she did have someone… and she never told me!"

"There must be a reason, Cass. Your mother was one of the most open people I ever knew."

"I KNOW! It's really strange. Anyway, I thought maybe there might be something in her PC, here at home, but I can't get into her profile. I mean, if we could find out who he was, we can… er... talk and things. At the very least we can let him know she's died. I mean, he probably doesn't even KNOW!"

"Well, yes, that's true…" Sam said slowly, even while her mind was racing. "Cass, have there been any unexplained phone calls or messages?"

"Well, no; but I've hardly been here. I mean, at first I was staying with you and then I got settled in school. I'm only here this weekend, because I needed to sort out some things and get the house ready for selling. I left the answering machine off, 'cause the messages were all the same… Sorry she's gone etc…" There was that pain again, and despite her tiredness, Sam knew what she had to do.

"Get some coffee on," she said briskly. "I'll be there in 15."

"But Sam. You were  _asleep_." Despite her protests, Sam could hear the relief in Cassie's voice.

"It's OK, Honey. Catching up with you will be a much better tonic; and anyway I can sleep just as well over there."

"Well, if you're sure, that'd be great. See you soon."

"Soon, yeah! And in the morning we'll have a look at that PC."

...

The next morning, bright and early, Sam and Cassie sat at Janet's desk, studying her computer. The previous night they hadn't talked for long before they had both succumbed to much needed sleep. Cassie didn't look like she'd been getting much either, recently. Sam could feel her relief at having her there, and certainly this morning she looked better, and hopefully had finally had some sleep.

It didn't take long for Sam to get into Janet's personal profile, but upon opening her sent messages, a surprise awaited her.

"Well. I'll be… One thing you can be sure of Cassie, he DOES know about Janet's death!"

"Why? What is it? Do you know who this Paul is?"

"Look at the addy."

"Paul Davis?"

"Yes, he works out of the Pentagon. He's the SGC liaison officer. But I don't know why Janet would keep this secret. There's nothing stopping them from seeing each other. They're the same rank, and they work in different commands."

"Not like you and Jack, you mean?"

"Cassie! There has never been that kind of relationship between us."

"But, there could be, if it wasn't for the regs. Mom said…"

"Cass, I am in a perfectly happy relationship with someone else."

"Oh yes. How is Pete?" She sounded very disparaging.

"Pete's fine. And you really would like him if you got to know him better."

"Sorry Sam, yes he is really nice. It's just I always thought you and Jack…"

"Well that's a no-go and always has been."

"Pity though?" Cassie was watching her closely, and Sam felt a blush creeping up her face.

"Maybe, but all academic now. My future lies with Pete."

"OK. So this Paul? Do you think I could meet him?"

"Depends on why they were keeping it secret. I never even knew they knew each other."

"But you could ask him, quietly?"

"Why is this so important to you, Cassie?"

"I don't know… I guess I just want to know that she was happy. The last couple of years I've been out with my friends and we hadn't spent that much time together. I've been feeling guilty, that I should have been more understanding… more THERE for her, if you know what I mean?"

"Yeah, I do. OK, I'll talk to him and see if he'll see you."

"Thanks, Sam. I love you."

"Me too, Honey. Me too!"

...


	2. Connections

* * *

I don't own Stargate SG-1 and its characters:

They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.

I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this;

it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.

* * *

AN:  _Sorry for the delay in updating - Christmas and all that Jazz! Anyway should be updating weekly from now on ~ Enjoy_

* * *

Spoilers for Beneath the Surface / New Order II / Lockdown / Zero Hour

* * *

…

As it happened it was a number of weeks before Sam was able to speak to Major Davis, as a series of events took her whole attention.

She'd spent that weekend with Cassie, catching up, and the Colonel had come on Sunday to see Cassie as well. Sam had felt a sense of joy as soon as she had heard his voice echoing in from the front door as Cassie answered it.

Sam knew her future lay with Pete. They shared mutual interests, they could laugh together, her brother was his friend so they could spend comfortable time with her family, and she loved him, she really did. But… hidden deep in her heart were her feelings for the man just entering the room with his arm slung around Cassie's shoulder. All the joy and fun and  _pain_  they had shared meant that those feelings would always be there.

Despite denying to Cassie that a romantic relationship had never existed she knew she had longed for one at times, and she had a feeling that the Colonel had as well. One of the hardest moments of her life was on the ice planet when she recovered her memories of the regulations and had to admit to herself that what she wanted with O'Neill could never be. So those feelings would always need to stay hidden, never see the light of day, but would they eventually go completely away?

…

On their return to the SGC there was the ceremony where Doctor Weir formally handed command to General O'Neill and then an unexpected addition to the ceremony when she was unexpectedly promoted to Lieutenant Colonel. When she had received her Major's oak leaves from General Hammond she had felt so honored, but the feeling of having them exchanged for silver leaves by Jack O'Neill was indescribable. This man meant so much to her, and she knew that however far she progressed in the Air Force no other promotion would ever matter to her as much as this one.

Quickly following the handover, the SGC was struck by a series of near disasters, and General O'Neill and his staff hardly had time to take a breath, before something else came along. First, there was the infection of the Russian cosmonaut by Anubis, causing mayhem, quarantine and lockdown, before Sam devised a way to trick Anubis onto an ice planet; and this incident, of course, also caused a diplomatic nightmare with the Russians.

Following on the heels of that was the disappearance of SG-1, claims from Ba'al to have captured them, an invasive quick growing plant engulfing all parts of the SGC, a couple of troublesome ambassadors from warring worlds, and double dealing from another Goa'uld, Camulus. Somehow O'Neill managed to sort out all these messes, as well as breaking protocol and ordering the iris to be opened for SG-1 coming in hot, going on his instinct and knowledge of them rather than the claims of Ba'al to have compromised them.

So Jack had proved his worth and the President officially endorsed him as the SGC commander, and visited to ratify his endorsement. Those present included Major, now Lieutenant Colonel, Davis, so Sam decided to take the opportunity to try to speak with him. Seeing him leaving the Gate Room she quickly followed and caught him in the corridor outside.

"Colonel Davis! May I speak to you for a moment?"

"Is it urgent, Colonel? I only have a few moments."

"It's about Janet… Major Fraiser." His whole body went very still and she was amazed at the emotion suddenly flooding his face for a moment. In that second Sam saw that whatever Janet had felt for him, she herself had obviously meant a very great deal to the Colonel. As quickly as the emotion had been there, however, his usual calm mask was back on his face. It was lightning fast and if Sam had not been looking directly at his face as she had said Janet's name, she would have missed it.

"I don't… What can I do for you about Major Fraiser? She's…" He swallowed hard, betraying himself again for a moment. "That is, I'm sure there is nothing that I know about her that you don't. I thought you were very close friends."

"We were, but she never told me about your relationship."

"Relationship? I assure you, Colonel, I have no idea what you are talki…"

Sam interrupted him. "Colonel, we found her bracelet, and the emails." He stared at her and then shook his head slightly, looking down to the floor.

"What do you want, Sam?" he softly said at last. "Why does this matter now?"

"Because it matters to Cassie," she answered just as softly. "And going by your reaction, it would help you too, to talk about her to others who loved her." He looked up at that and Sam saw a sheen of tears in his eyes, and then suddenly a young lieutenant interrupted them, apologizing, but also saying that they needed to leave. He turned slightly and acknowledged him and Sam once more saw a rapid transformation as suddenly the unemotional Colonel Davis was firmly back in charge of himself.

"I'm just coming," he said. "One moment, and I'll be there." The lieutenant nodded and saluted and as he turned to leave, Paul Davis turned quickly back to Sam.

"I'm going to be back at the SGC by the weekend, we can talk then if that would do? But not here, not on base"

She nodded. "We'll meet you at Janet's house on Saturday, about ten?"

"Yes, that's fine. I'll see you then."

"I'll email the address."

"It's OK. I know where it is. I've been there before." And he turned and walked rapidly up the corridor.

"Of course you have!" said Sam softly to herself. To be honest she was quite amazed at what had been revealed in that short conversation. She had known Paul Davis for years and never suspected that under that calm, slightly cold exterior, such strong emotions existed. He was apparently adept at keeping a mask in place and she wondered how Janet had managed to break through. In fact, the mask was so complete that he obviously fooled the majority of people around him. She knew of no-one else with such rigid control, except, perhaps, for O'Neill.

…

The following Saturday, Sam and Cassie waited for Paul to arrive. Cassie had sounded pleased and yet also a little apprehensive when Sam had called her and told her about it. They had stayed together at the house the night before and Cassie had admitted that although she really wanted to meet Paul and know more about his relationship with his mother, she was concerned about why Janet had not wanted to bring them together.

"Why was it hidden, Sam? D'you think she thought I wouldn't understand her wanting to have a life apart from me? Was she ashamed of me?"

"Don't be silly, Cassie, of course not. I'm sure there was a perfectly reasonable explanation as to why they kept it secret. And I think Paul knows because at first he tried to deny it, even now. You'll see, he'll explain it to us."

They both jumped as the doorbell rang and they went together to answer it. Cassie stared dumbly at the man standing on the doorstep; a man who had, apparently, meant so much to her mother. She wanted to resent this man, and her mother, for keeping her in the dark. For letting her believe that by going away to college, she was abandoning her mother and leaving her all alone. But somehow, now, looking at him; at the trepidation and yet hope on his face, at the LOVE that was shining from his eyes as he looked at the girl he had never spoken to before, she couldn't resent him. She just wanted to get to know him and to understand who he was to her mother, and who he could potentially be to her.

And then he spoke, one word before his voice broke on a sob; "Cassie." And suddenly she was engulfed in his arms, and she felt him shaking and knew that here was a man who had truly loved her mother.

Sam watched all this happen, and then quietly, without a word, went to the sitting room to wait for them. They needed this moment alone.

…

When they came into the room a few moments later, Sam saw that a little of the loss Cassie had been radiating since her mother's death had been put away. Obviously as far as Cassie was concerned, bringing this meeting about had been a very good thing.

Paul settled down to talk to them and explained why they had been a secret because of the threat to the SGC. He told them of the Washington rumblings to put a new administration in place with an agenda that could be a threat to the alliances the Command had formed. Paul saw Hammond and his policies as the best thing for the SGC and for Earth, but he knew that there were those desperate to get rid of the General and all those loyal to him.

"I thought that if they knew of my close connection to Janet, they would work to get me re-assigned and put one of their own in place as the liaison. I had already been warned that perhaps I worked too well with Dr. Jackson to be completely impartial when it came to the SGC."

Paul went on to tell them that ironically with the recent events, and O'Neill now being installed at Stargate Command, it was very unlikely that agenda would come to be. Robert Wolsey had told him, in confidence, that Vice President Kinsey had already tipped his hand to the new President; and that President Hayes was determined to keep the Command under the administration it had always been under. Hayes now had Hammond as a close advisor when it came to all extra-terrestrial affairs, and Paul had been partly transferred to the SGC to encourage the diplomatic relations with other planets even more.

"I only have to be in Washington a few days a month from now on. My main office is going to be at the SGC." He gave a bitter laugh. "Janet and I could have finally been properly together."

"You really felt that serious about her?" asked Cassie.

"I loved her, Cassie. With all my heart. I wanted to marry her and make a life with her. I've never felt that deeply about any woman before. I wanted a wife and a family but I just never met the one, I guess, and I could never just settle. I've always been an all or nothing type of person. I was beginning to think I would only ever be married to the job, and then I rescued Jan from a flat tire and my whole life changed. But now I WILL just have the job because there could never be another Janet. No-one else could ever come close."

The deep emotion and sincerity in his voice had a tremendous effect on both of the listening woman. Sam wished with all her heart she had come to properly know Paul when Janet was still alive, and as for Cassie, she had tears pouring down her face and moved across to where he was sitting to hug him again.

"I'm sorry, Cassie, I didn't mean to upset you." Paul spoke in a voice choked by the unshed tears in his own eyes. "I wanted to be part of your life, as well. I can't describe what it was like to stand at the back at the memorial and not have any right to openly mourn her with the rest of you. I desperately wanted to be able to comfort you and yet because of our decision to keep it secret I couldn't."

"Well we've found you now, and we're not going to let you go. If you had married Mom, you would have been my stepfather, so that makes you family and now you're stuck with us. Isn't that right, Sam?"

"Yes it is. Especially, as you are now going to be here so much. Welcome to our family, Paul."

…

They talked long into the night. Every word Paul said about Janet, every story he told them, made it even more clear how very much he had loved her. For such a short relationship in terms of actual time, they had made a wealth of memories. It was obvious they had made the most of every moment spent together. And within every word was hidden pain. Every joyful moment told about was overlaid with the pain that there could be no more of them.

It made Sam stop and consider. If she did want a future with Pete, should she remain at the SGC? Was it fair to him to put herself so at risk? Janet had hardly ever been off-world, and yet she had died to enemy fire. Sam was off-world nearly every week, and often in perilous situations. She trusted Teal'c and Daniel, but had to admit there were times when the team really needed their fourth and sorely missed O'Neill's presence. They had been doing this a long time now and surely one day their luck would run out.

…


	3. Decisions

I don't own Stargate SG-1 and its characters:

They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.

I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this;

it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.

* * *

 

Spoilers for Heroes II / Affinity

* * *

…

Sam's pondering about her future had an extra element added, as Pete asked her to marry him and gave her a ring. She knew Pete was committed to her, and despite the fact that she hadn't even given him an answer, he was willing to help her friends for her. Pete's observations and investigation into the murder of Krista's boyfriend had been very important in establishing a different scenario to the obvious one that Teal'c had murdered him.

As she had said to O'Neill in their discussion, she still wondered if it was fair to him, for her to put her life in danger exploring other planets. Add to that the issue of having children one day; and she knew that if she did marry Pete having children would come up sooner rather than later. She wanted the whole family deal and time was passing, so every year she put it off made viable pregnancies more unlikely and difficult. But what then, when they did have children? Would she drop off her kids at day care before heading off-world? Pete was a wonderful guy, willing to relocate to the Springs for her, but she couldn't really imagine him giving up his whole career to be a house husband and father, and he worked unpredictable hours as well.

By far the biggest impact on her from that discussion, however, was her feeling that any possibility, slim as it was, of a future with Jack O'Neill was well and truly gone. When they had closed the door on their feelings she had moved on, hard as it was, and connected with Pete; and it was obvious to her that he had done the same. Very deep down within herself she thought there had been a hope that when she told him of the proposal he would declare his love for her and tell her not to marry Pete.

But of course he hadn't. Instead, he had encouraged her to consider the marriage, and illustrated that people at the mountain did have lives and families. Hell, Janet had died saving Simon Wells, which had enabled him to return to his pregnant wife and be there for the birth of his daughter. Baby Janet wouldn't exist if her father had decided he couldn't serve at the SGC and have a family.

But… If…. Besides… Sam's thoughts swirled round and round her head. Yes it was true that other personnel at the SGC were married with families, but most of those were men. There were females who were married, but any who became pregnant had transferred out by their own choice. The only female member of the USAF serving at the mountain who had children had been Janet, and look how well that had worked out for Cassie!

SO… she needed to decide. If she married Pete, she would leave the SGC, and because she couldn't imagine doing any other job in the Air Force NOT connected to the SGC, it would probably be better to have a complete change and resign from the Air Force altogether. Without any connection to her old life she could really build a new one with Pete. As his transfer to Colorado Springs hadn't completely gone through, they could stay and live in Denver. The University had a very prestigious Physics and Astronomy Department; perhaps she could teach. She'd always enjoyed teaching at the Academy. Those she was really close to like Jacob, Daniel, Teal'c, Cassie and now Paul could easily visit as it wasn't that far away, and more importantly, it would remove her completely from the sphere of Jack O'Neill's life and allow her to completely commit to her marriage.

A few hours later, after she and Pete had been on the team rescuing Daniel and Krista, the  _if_  had become a  _when_ , as she had told Pete, yes, she would marry him. She had gone on to tell him her decision to leave the Air Force, and although he had half-heartedly asked her if she was sure she wanted to give up her career, she could tell he was happy that in the future she would no longer be in a dangerous occupation.

…

The plan was to quietly hand her resignation to O'Neill and then to talk to Daniel and Teal'c separately, but in the end she told them altogether, as she was called into a briefing on the future of SG-1 and that a decision had been made to add a fourth member again. They had all seemed shocked for a moment and then the General congratulated her on her engagement but asked her to reconsider leaving at least the Air Force, if not the program. She assured them all she had thought long and hard and her mind was made up.

For his part O'Neill seemed to recover quickly from the shock and promised her he would ensure the paperwork was processed as soon as possible.

"If you are really sure this is what you want, Carter, then I won't stand in your way. I know you always consider everything before you make a decision."

She quickly looked up at him on that declaration, remembering their discussion in the lab and wondering if he was regretting what he had said, but his face was simply showing a bland smile and all his masks were firmly in place.

"I am sure, Sir, thank you."

"Very well, then I suggest you take the weekend and then start closing down your lab and the on-going projects next week. I'll remove SG-1 from rotation for now. Daniel, Teal'c, we'll have a meeting on Monday when I've had time to think on this." They both nodded. "Very well, dismissed, have a good weekend." He exited the briefing room into his office, leaving the other two men congratulating their friend.

…

When Sam had made her announcement, Daniel had happened to be looking directly at Jack and there had been a brief flash of pain in the man's eyes which had disquieted him. Remembering how Jack could lock himself away when he was hurting, Daniel therefore decided it would be a good idea to call in on him that night.

Arriving at the house, he found it all in darkness, but Jack's truck was there, so Daniel decided to check the roof. Sure enough, he could just make out a dim figure leaning back in the armchair by the telescope.

"Jack?"

"Go away, Daniel!" His voice was slurred, confirming Daniel's fears, and as he got closer he could make out empty beer bottles littering the area around the chair. Jack himself was slumped back in the chair with a bottle clutched in his hands. But this one had the distinctive shape of Jack Daniels.

"Thought you could use some company."

"Well, you thought wrong! GO AWAY!"

"I really think you need some company," Daniel answered quietly, and Jack gave a deep sigh.

"Never give up, do you?" Daniel shrugged and gave a deprecating smile.

"It's just the way I am."

"Yeah, right!" Jack sighed again. "Well, you don't need to worry… I'm not going back to my deep, dark place. I just need a night of total oblivion! Not that it's working! I think I'm drunk-out!"

"Why do you want total oblivion?"

"WHY!" Jack exploded. "Why! For God's sake Daniel, you know why!"

"Because Sam is getting married? Or because she's thinking of leaving?"

"Neither of the above actually, the married-thing hurts, but I could cope with that; and even the leaving, which might turn out to be easier for me than seeing her and knowing she's married to someone else. I KNOW this is right for her, she needs someone to love her and I never fathomed what she saw in an old war-horse like me anyway! But that… today, it really, really hurt… hence the oblivion!"

"What hurts?" Jack stared at him in amazement.

"I just TOLD you… in great detail, which for me is a first and TOTALLY out of character I might add," he squinted down at the JD bottle. "Must be the happy juice talking!"

"No Jack, you worked around it, but you never actually spelled exactly what IT is!" Jack stared again.

"Bit dense tonight there, Spacemonkey. OK, in words of one syllable… It's not the married-thing, nor the leaving-thing per-se, it's the REASON for the leaving."

"The reason? You said it wasn't the marriage." Jack exploded again

"NOT the marriage, the REASON! That she'll throw it all in – career, duty, everything… just in case she's being unfair to him! Even though he's prepared to move jobs to the Springs; move, mind you, WITHIN his career, she'd completely LEAVE her career on the off-chance she's being unfair! He's not asked her to, and her staying in the Air Force doesn't stop them marrying, but she's STILL leaving! CHRIST, when your time's up, it's up. She could cross the road tomorrow and get run down by a bus!" And then he added so quietly that Daniel had to strain to hear. "But she wouldn't even consider moving to another team within the SGC to give us a chance to be together."

"Then again, neither did you." Jack looked up at him and slowly nodded.

"No, I didn't. I needed to have her there with me, so I could watch her six. Bottom-line… the SGC and what we did mattered more than our feelings. But now Pete matters more, and I suppose THAT's what really hurts."

"You could try telling her what you told me."

"No, Daniel, that would hurt HER, and I don't want to do that. I want her to be happy, so I just need a night or two to wallow and then I can try and smile for her."

"But, Ja…."

"It doesn't matter now anyway, she'd still have to leave to be with me because whatever team she was on will be under my command. So… No more talking! I'm all talked out and now I need to get drunk. Stay and join me or go away, but no more talking! OK?" Daniel hesitated and started to speak, and then seeing Jack's lips pressed firmly together knew he would get no more conversation that night. So he merely held out his hand to Jack, silently asking for a drink. Jack grabbed a bottle of beer from the crate beside him and after handing it over to Daniel, also got for himself. As Daniel took a sip of beer, however, he wasn't really surprised to see Jack put down the beer and retrieve the Jack Daniels. He held out the bottle of beer towards Jack.

"Here's to Sam."

"Yeah, to Sam!" They chinked the different bottles and then sat silently drinking and gazing at the stars. Daniel hoped he'd helped his friend by coming, and Jack, despite his protestation about needing to be alone, found solace in Daniel's silent company.

…


	4. Revelations

I don't own Stargate SG-1 and its characters:

They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.

I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this; it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.

* * *

_AN: Huge apologies for the delay in the posting of this story. This month I received a promotion at work and for the past month have been doing two jobs while they find a replacement for me in my old job! And on top of working 12 days I've been fighting a hellish cold so all I wanted when I finally got home was to go to bed. I have finally managed to get back to my writing and I hope you feel this chapter was worth the wait._

* * *

Spoilers for Sacrifices / Threads

* * *

Chapter Four - Revelations

…

Sam spent the weekend with Pete, who was overjoyed at her decision to leave the Air Force He said he would have tried to get used to having a 'super-hero' wife but was really relieved she was going to do something a lot less dangerous so she could concentrate on family life. He gave her the impression that he expected the teaching job she was planning to apply for to be just a stop-gap until she became a mother and housewife. Is that really what she wanted? Wasn't she going from one extreme to the other?

Upon returning to the base on Monday she felt no excitement at the thought that she was closing down projects to move on to a new life. With every step she took towards leaving she felt more and more reluctant to do so. "It's just cold feet," she told herself. "Everything will be fine when I get to Denver and find a new job."

However, finding that new job had to be put on hold, as the USAF wanted the full three month notice period from her. They stated that she was going to be very difficult to replace, O'Neill told her, apologetically, but she would mainly remain on base with her projects, as he had already started to look at her replacement for SG-1. Despite her increasing belief that she had made a mistake, Sam thought that removing herself from O'Neill's vicinity was the right decision. After his initial surprise when she had first told them, he now appeared to be anxious to be rid of her.

…

The next couple of months were difficult for Sam as she felt herself under pressure both at work and at home. O'Neill didn't come down to her lab, anymore, and with her work mainly confined to scientific projects that she was closing off and sending on the Area 51 for further analysis or handing over to other scientists at the SGC, she only had an occasional official meeting with him, and these were always short and to the point. It was very clear he wanted her gone.

SG-1 was frequently off-world and so she rarely saw Daniel or Teal'c either, especially as they spent the majority of their downtime getting to know and bonding with their new teammates. SG-1 was now comprised of Daniel, Teal'c, the new commander Lt. Colonel Cameron Mitchell, and their fourth, Lt. Jennifer Hailey. It was a prestigious posting for a young lieutenant, but Sam knew that Jennifer could cope with it and was sorry that she herself would not be around to see the young woman achieve the outstanding potential identified at the Academy.

So at the SGC, Sam was feeling increasingly alienated and alone, while at home it was the opposite, but that that didn't make her feel any better. Pete was usually there, so she was not alone, but they never actually  _spent_  time together as they had before. Her time at home mainly consisted of eating, sleeping and planning their wedding, which meant Pete threw ideas, suggestions and brochures at her. He even brought home a couple of wedding dress magazines as he obviously believed that left to her nothing would be done. Although, maybe he had a point, as Sam was finding it very hard to get her head around actually planning a wedding in the near future.

Maybe that wouldn't have been so bad, but Pete's conversation, when not wedding based, was composed of giving her grief about the USAF not releasing her early so they could get on with moving to Denver and he could get back to his job. He had requested a temporary assignment to the Colorado Springs Police Department but, knowing it was for a short time only, he couldn't settle down and was antsy to return to his post in Denver. Sam had suggested he go back to Denver without her and she would follow when she was free, but he gave her such a wounded look she had immediately recanted on her idea and told him she didn't want him to go.

The only reprieve Sam felt from all of this pressure was the time she spent with Cassie and Paul Davis, when Pete was at work and she was free, or he was in Denver checking in with his home, which he did every couple of weeks. As Paul was now based mainly at the SGC he had decided to buy a house, and what better than Janet's, where he had spent some of the happiest times of his life. In this house he felt close to his lost love, he explained to Sam, and he was so glad she and Cassie had made contact, so that he could buy it without raising suspicions as to the coincidence. Another advantage was that Cassie still had a familiar home to return to in Colorado Springs in the holidays and school breaks.

At work Paul was very busy and did not have time to catch up with her, although they did occasionally lunch together, but when they were both free she went to the house where she had spent so many happy times with Janet and they relaxed and talked, often about the woman they both still sorely missed. Sam was discovering a very different man to the one she had known before. He had a wide range of knowledge on many diverse topics combined with a very dry sense of humor, and to top it off was a superb cook, giving her wonderful meals to enjoy whenever she went there. No wonder Janet had loved him. As often as possible for these visits, Cassie also joined them, and Sam loved to see the closeness developing between the two. The only man Sam had previously seen have such a close father/daughter relationship with Cassie was Jack O'Neill.

…

With just a month to go until the USAF released her Sam was becoming more and more concerned about her future and doubting her decision to move on from the SGC and the Air Force.

A week or so before there had been a Jaffa furore at the SGC, with the wedding of Teal'c's son Ry'ac and the near death of Ish'ta, the woman Teal'c had become very attached to. Sam had talked to Teal'c after the Jaffa had left and asked him why he remained at the SGC when all those he loved were off-world. After all, he had lost many years of his life with his late wife because of his decision to follow Jack O'Neill and openly turn on the Goa'uld. He had told her that he owed a debt of honor to O'Neill and that his pledge of allegiance to the Taur'i was for the length of time it took to completely defeat the Goa'uld. He believed that the only way for his people to be free was through this allegiance, as Janet had already proved with her development of tretonin.

"When the time is right, I will join my brothers and sisters as we found our own home world. But for now the best way I can achieve that goal and fulfill my debt is to remain with the Tau'ri fight. Ish'ta and Ry'ac both understand this, and I will see them and visit them in the meantime. Besides not all those I love are away from the SGC. I also have deep feelings for O'Neill, Daniel Jackson, Cassie Fraiser and yourself. We do not need to be together for those feelings to exist, and I will not simply forget them when you have left here. You will always remain in my heart, Samantha Carter."

Sam had been overwhelmed by his words, and suddenly knew them to be true for herself as well. Leaving the SGC, and even the Air Force would not mean she would forget her friends here, nor her feelings for Jack O'Neill. She had to face the truth of that and consider again whether marrying Pete was fair to herself or to him.

…

And now she was in Denver with Pete visiting his family and the concerns were still racing around her head. Everyone seemed to be taking it for granted that she would be settling down into the role of wife and mother as soon as the wedding had taken place. Her plans to work at the University the whole family seemed to regard as a stop gap until she became pregnant. The women of the Shanahan family were all stay-at-home mothers who had no ambitions for a career, and they seemed to regard working for a living as something that had to be done if money was short, but certainly not something that was to be  _desired_.

Matters came to a head when Pete told her he had a surprise for her and they drove to a picture perfect little house. He had bought them a house! It was a house she liked but the point was she had had no say in it. It wasn't that he had found it and was showing it to her to see if they both wanted it. He had already gone ahead and bought it. A  _fait accompli_ ; and he was expecting her to be delighted and fall into his arms in thanks.

Well he didn't get what he expected. Sam sat down with him in the garden of the pretty little house and explained as gently as she could that it was not working out. That she had come to realize that what they each wanted from life was very different and that she could no longer see a future for them. He didn't rant or get angry, but he was very upset and for that she was sorry, but she could no longer continue to pretend that all would be well after the wedding took place.

Sam left Pete sitting sadly outside his new house and returned to Colorado Springs hoping it wasn't too late to withdraw her resignation; and, perhaps, to try to repair her relationship with a certain grey-haired General.

…

The first thing Sam did after getting back home was to contact Paul and see if he was free for her to go round and talk. He readily agreed and offered her dinner in exchange for the conversation.

"I don't think it's a fair exchange," laughed Sam down the phone. "But I'm not going to turn down a chance to eat your cooking!"

"Flattery will get you everywhere," he replied with a laugh of his own. "How long will you be?"

"About half an hour?"

"That's fine. See you then."

…

An hour or so later found Sam sitting in Paul's small dining room, eating a delicious home-made lasagna with side salad, and filling him on what had happened in Denver. As she finished telling him about the house, she paused and took a long drink of her wine, and then looked him straight in the eye.

"So… do you think the Air Force will let me withdraw my resignation?"

"I think they'll snap your hand off. They never wanted you to go in the first place. You're far too valuable to replace. That'll be what the full three month notice was about - hoping you'd change your mind."

"Wow! You really think so?"

"I do." He smiled at her, and Sam bit her lip, thinking and then gave a little nod.

"D'you mind if I love you and leave you? Very rude I know, eating your food and then running off and leaving you with the dishes. But I'm anxious to get this sorted. It's still quite early so I'd like to go round to the General's house and let him know." She started to get up from the table, but Paul put his hand over hers, stilling her.

"Leave it 'til the morning, Sam. It's been two months; another few hours aren't going to hurt."

"I just…" but Paul interrupted her.

"Sam, I don't think he'll be alone. You hardly emerge from your lab so you probably haven't noticed, but we have had a member of the new oversight committee at the base for a few weeks, Kerry Johnson. She and General O'Neill are getting on very well together. I saw them the other night out for dinner."

"Oh, I see." Sam spoke slowly. "Better left then. I'll go see him tomorrow."

"I'm sorry, Sam."

"Nothing to be sorry for." She gave him a bright smile, but sadness lingered in her eyes. "I'm glad he's got someone. He deserves to be happy."

"But you… and he…"

"No, Paul. We never could and if I come back never can. So it's all for the best. He was happy for me, and I'll be the same for him."

He smiled at her. "Come on, let's clear these plates. I made you some blue Jell-o."

She laughed and the sparkle returned to her eyes. "Wow. Lead me to it then."

She helped him clear the table and then watched as he served the Jell-o, thinking about her choices. She'd chosen to leave the Air Force for Pete, but had never considered it to take a chance on a relationship with Jack, and now she wondered why she never had, as she finally admitted to herself that she was in love with him and had been for years. Well… too late now. She would try to get her job back and enjoy a life with all her close friends near. And she would be glad that the man she was in love with was going to be happy after years spent alone. Trouble was it wouldn't be with her.

…


	5. Disappearance

I don't own Stargate SG-1 and its characters:

They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.

I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this;

it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.

* * *

Minor Spoilers for Citizen Joe

* * *

Chapter Five - Disappearance

…

Returning to the SGC the next day, Sam didn't get the chance to tell O'Neill of her wish to withdraw her resignation because he had taken a day's leave. She resigned herself to waiting for his return the next day and tried not to dwell on the fact that Kerry Johnson was also absent from the base.

The next day, however, O'Neill did  _not_  return and Walter Davis reported he was not answering his phone. A few weeks before the General had been held up at gunpoint in his own home. That had all worked out in the end, but had he been targeted again? The 2IC of the base, Colonel Dixon, was currently off-world, leaving Paul as the ranking officer. He called Sam and Daniel to his office to help him plan what to do. SG-1 was on downtime and the other three members had all gone away, so Daniel was the only member on base.

"Well, Kerry Johnson is not here either and Jack's been spending a lot of time with her." Daniel said, "I have her cell number, maybe she'll know where he is. Shall I give her a call?" Paul nodded and Daniel dialed the number, putting it onto speakerphone so that they could all hear.

"HI Kerry, it's Daniel Jackson. Is Jack with you?"

"No. Why would he be? I'm in Washington. I won't be back at the SGC until next month."

"He…. Er… took a day's leave yesterday but hasn't returned, and as you're seeing each other we just thought he was doing something with you."

"We're not together, Daniel."

"Sorry… I thought… "

"No, we're not seeing each other anymore." Her voice was soft and sad. "Jack and I would have been good together… WERE good together, as friends, but then we started to move beyond friendship and he just… well he couldn't. There's someone else in his life that he can't be with… I don't know why… but he can't get past his feelings for her. Jack's in love… just not with me!"

"I'm sorry."

"No, don't be. It just wasn't meant to be."

"Well I'm sorry I bothered you."

"That's OK, Don't be sorry. It's not your fault; not anyone's fault really. Let me know that he's OK please, when you find him… Oh and when you DO find him; tell him I hope everything works out for him."

"Thanks, Kerry, I will." Daniel hung up, and then looked up at Paul and Sam.

"So… you heard?" Paul nodded, but it was Sam who answered him

"Yes," she said softly, "I think I need to have a talk with our good General when we find him."

"But first we must find him," said Paul. "Look I'm tied up here, there's no other ranking office with most of the teams off-world or off duty. "Why don't the two of you go and have a look at his house and see if there are any clues as to where he might have gone."

…

As he drove down the mountain, Daniel shot a side glance at Sam and noted the worried expression on her face. He took a deep breath and then spoke.

"So… you do have feelings for Jack?"

She looked at him with an irritated frown. "Of course I do, Daniel. You know that."

"What about Pete?"

"We're over."

"What! What happened?"

"It just didn't feel right. And when I finally admitted to myself that the main reason was because although I loved Pete, I was in love with the General, it all became clear to me. So I intended to withdraw my resignation, but now the stupid man is missing so I can't!"

"We'll find him, Sam. And then you can tell him how you really feel and he can tell you how he really feels and we can get back to normal! The last few months have been awful."

"He might not feel like that about me."

"Are you nuts? You heard Kerry. Anyway I had it from the horse's mouth how he feels, the night you put  _in_  your resignation."

"Daniel! Why didn't you tell me?"

"He wouldn't let me. He wanted you to be happy and he thought that was what you wanted."

Sam gave a sigh and rubbed her forehead in frustration. "I've really messed this up. Haven't I?"

"We'll find him, Sam, and get it all sorted out."

…

An hour or so later, at Jack's house, they still were no closer to finding him. There was no trace of where he might be at the house. There were other things however, in his study, and Sam wanted to sit down and weep as she realized the magnitude of the hurt she had put him through. She'd found a handmade wooden box with her name carved into the top; and inside photographs of her she had never seen before, most taken off world on missions, but some at home with the team, her father, Janet and Cassie.

There were also papers filled with poetry, in many different styles, that he must have found and copied, the only thing in common being that they spoke of a great love, very often unrequited. And then there was a velvet box in a date stamped package containing an exquisite diamond and sapphire ring. Looking at the date she saw it had been bought over three years before. She thought how she had felt in the moment Paul had told her that he was seeing someone, and her heart ached for him.

"Oh God! Is that how Jack's felt? For all these years?"

Daniel found her, sitting on the floor, with the box in her lap and her eyes blinded by tears.

"Look at this," she said. "I've been such a fool. I settled for a man who wanted me because I couldn't have the man I wanted."

"Sam! It's not too late. We WILL find him."

Sam shook her head. "You can't promise that Daniel. We have no clue where he is. Oh God, where on Earth has he got to?"

…

Late the previous night, Jack O'Neill had been wondering the self-same thing. He'd awoken to find himself jammed behind the wheel of a vehicle which seemed to have been in a collision with a very hard object. His whole body hurt and he raised a shaky hand to his forehead as his vision blurred to discover blood staining his temple. He groaned again and tried to move only to have his shoulder scream at him! Pain, pain and yet more pain! It shot in waves from his shoulder and all down his left side!

"Shit what the hell… Oh God!" His memory had suddenly flooded back and he craned his neck around as gently as possible to view the other occupants of the vehicle, but to his relief could see no movement.

"Well Jack, another fine mess you've got yourself into!"

It had all started out so well!

…

 


	6. Recovery

I don't own Stargate SG-1 and its characters:

They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.

I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this;

it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.

* * *

Minor Spoilers for Chain Reaction / Zero Hour

* * *

Chapter Six - Recovery

...

At the same time that Sam was wondering where Jack was, Paul was receiving a phone call from the Colorado Springs Police Department giving him the answer.

The night before, eight sets of parents had contacted them to report their child missing. All the children were aged between nine and ten, and they attended the Robert Adams Elementary School. They had been taken out for the day to the Pikes Peak Park by a volunteer to the school, one Jack O'Neill. However when the parents went to meet the minibus at the school at nine pm as arranged, they had all failed to arrive.

The Ranger Service for the area had been alerted and a search had begun. The police had only managed to contact the school principal that morning and had been filled in on Jack O'Neill's credentials as an Air Force General, head of a command based at Cheyenne Mountain. He spent a portion of his free time visiting and supporting the school, where his goddaughter Cassandra Fraiser had attended. On discovering that the eight children, now missing, had missed out on their annual school trip, because they had all been ill with a very nasty tummy bug, he had arranged to take them out into the forest for a day.

The Rangers had found the children off one of the main tracks huddled together but not too worse for wear after spending a night out in the forest. They were hungry and a little dirty and quite frightened, but otherwise unharmed. The children had told them that they had been abandoned in the forest when some 'bad men' made Colonel Jack drive away and leave them. Colonel Jack, they explained, was from the Air Force, but he often came to the school to see them.

Further down the track the Rangers had found a crashed minibus containing three men, two alive but unconscious and injured and one very dead. The two injured men had been taken to Pikes Peak Regional Hospital and the police were holding both of them under guard until the whole situation had been resolved and the men had been properly identified. Paul assured them that Air Force personnel would attend immediately. Then he phoned Daniel and Sam and filled them in.

He was frustrated that with the continuing absence of Colonel Dixon, he had to remain on base and couldn't go with them, but as always he was very diligent to his duties. Besides, he could do more good for Jack by keeping the command safe than hurrying off with the others. He debated calling Cassie, but decided it would be better to wait until he heard how Jack actually was.

Paul suddenly wondered, with a start, when all these people had become so much more important to him. They were friends now, family even, rather than the acquaintances they had been before. It was since moving here, he realized, or rather since they had discovered how close he had been to Janet. Despite her being gone, she was still influencing and affecting his life. Although he would never, now, have her as his wife, she had nevertheless given him a family and he was no longer alone, as he had always been before. As the only child of now dead and gone parents, he had been alone for so long that the whole concept felt very strange, but it was also wonderful, and one he was quickly getting used to.

…

The time it took to get to the hospital had Sam frustrated beyond measure. All the times she had travelled billions of light years in a single step and it was taking longer than an hour to simply drive about sixty miles! She wanted to be there NOW. To know for sure that the dead man was not Jack and that he was going to be alright.

On arrival they were met by a police officer, and although Sam was reassured to be told that Jack had been identified and he was definitely not dead, she really wanted to see for herself. However, he was currently undergoing surgery to correct his left shoulder which was badly dislocated, so she and Daniel followed the police officer into a quiet side room and listened as he told them the story that had been pieced together. They were very relieved to hear that part of the story had been in a statement from Jack, so he was obviously conscious at some point since being brought here.

It had all started when a holdup at a prestigious jewelers in Colorado Springs Banks had gone very badly wrong for the thieves. Although they had managed to get away, one of them had been shot by the guard as they escaped. After quickly changing cars they escaped up into the forest but the car they had stolen turned out to be a bad choice when it had broken down. Pushing the vehicle into a tree to make it look as though the driver had crashed, the injured man had lain down in the road when they heard another vehicle approaching.

This was the minibus containing Jack and the children, and when he saw the man in the road, Jack stopped and got out to go to help. However, as soon as he descended from the bus he found a gun in his face, and realized he's been tricked when the man in the road staggered to his feet. He could have tried to tackle them, but was worried about the children so he did as he was told.

The two men argued for a few minutes and then decided to abandon the children, but take Jack with them because they were worried that he would quickly get help and they would be caught. Besides if they made Jack drive, they could see to the bullet wound of the injured man. They had no idea who he really was and thought he was simply a driver, or maybe a teacher, but definitely not a threat, after the way he had quickly submitted to them. To be on the safe side though, they tied him into his seat, using his seat belt and rope around the fastener.

With the way he was tethered Jack could see no way to get free, at least without alerting them and getting shot for his trouble. And every mile took him further and further away from the children leaving them to the dangers of a night outdoors with possible low temperatures and animals who could attack them. Finally he decided his only option was to floor the vehicle and deliberately crash it. With any luck the men would be incapacitated, because neither was using a seat belt and they should be thrown around the vehicle.

To his relief the ploy worked, but unfortunately he managed to injure himself quite badly in the process. Tied as he was, and unable to move his arm, all he could do was wait for help and hope it arrived before either of the other men regained consciousness. Luckily for him the rescue did arrive, but it was a long worrying time as he drifted in and out of consciousness. As it happened, one man was badly injured and would not have been able to get to him even if he had regained consciousness, because both of his legs were broken, together with one of his arms and quite a few of his ribs. As for the other, the shot man, he had crashed his head and died on impact.

As the police officer finished his story there was a knock on the door and they all looked to see an emergency doctor. He told them that Jack had been very lucky. His worst injury was his shoulder and this had now been repaired. He had also managed to crack a couple of ribs, but apart from a knock on the head, that was all. There was still a small chance of concussion, but before the surgery he had been fairly alert apart from the pain and they weren't really worried about it.

"He's still very groggy and sleepy from the surgery, but you can go and sit with him now. We should only need to keep him for a couple of days. But we can arrange for him to be transferred to the Academy Hospital if you wish."

"I think we'll leave that decision to the General when he wakes up properly."

The doctor nodded. "That's fine. Room 27 just down the corridor on your left as you come out of the door."

"Thank you," Sam said as the doctor smiled and left.

"You go ahead, Sam. I'll phone Paul and fill him in." She smiled at Daniel in gratitude and then went to look for the room she had been directed to.

…

As Sam reached for the handle of the door, she paused for a moment and took a deep breath. This was it. Her whole future life was about to be decided in the next few minutes or hours, but she knew she had to face her fears of rejection, be brutally honest and stop hiding from what she felt. Going by the things she had found in his house, Jack felt the same way, but Sam could not be totally sure that she had not hurt him so much that he would still want her gone.

Opening the door and slipping into the room, Sam expected him to be sleeping, but as soon as she entered two bright brown eyes peered at her with startling clarity for a man so soon after undergoing surgery, and Jack smiled slightly.

"Carter," he said softly; and then gave a small frown. "Won't Pete be worried?"

"There is no Pete anymore."

"I'm sorry."

"Are you – I'm not."

"What happened?"

"I loved Pete dearly, but I wasn't being fair to him. You can't marry someone when you're in love with someone else."

"Someone else?"

She smiled. "Yeah, someone else."

"Do I know this person?"

"I think maybe you've run across him from time to time. Tall, grey hair, infuriating, exasperating, real smart though pretends to be dumb, loves to play at being a child, sexy as hell and has a world-class butt!"

"He has?!"

"Oh yeah! I love his butt! Love everything about him actually! Just wish I'd told him before."

"I think he knew, just didn't think it was that strong."

"Well actually, I don't think I realized how strong either, or at least I didn't LET myself realize it. I only let it seep into my consciousness at times of stress… and even then I don't think I really confronted just how strong my feelings were… are… I love you, Jack O'Neill. I was a fool to think there was ever a possibility of a life with Pete."

"You love me?"

Her smile grew wider. "Yes, I love you, Jack."

He stared at her in wonder. "Well then, looks like it's time for me to resign. Because you have withdrawn YOUR resignation haven't you?"

"You can't do that! And anyway you weren't at the base so I couldn't withdraw it."

"I can't NOT do that! I lost you once, and I'm sure as hell not going to lose you again!"

"You've just got your promotion; I can't let you do it. I've already resigned anyway."

"You know they'll take you back. You're too valuable. It was a silly idea to resign anyway as you've just got your promotion too. Anyway my career is in its death-throes. Yours is just beginning!"

"I'm not on SG-1 anymore anyway. So I could transfer somewhere else even if I do withdraw my resignation."

"If you transfer I'll never see you. I don't want a long distance relationship now we finally have a shot at a real one! Besides Cam would have you back like a shot on SG-1. He was disappointed you weren't still on the team. Could really use your experience too. He's had a couple of close calls."

"And what about Jennifer?"

"Nothing to say there can't be five on a team."

"They need you at the SGC."

"They need you more."

"But, Jack…"

"I've written my letter of resignation so many times I've lost count. One more time isn't gonna hurt!"

"So, why didn't you ever send it?"

"Because I couldn't face you going out there without me with you! But you've been going out there without me anyway! Who's there waiting at the SGC isn't going to make you any safer."

"SOP, General… If Bauer had been in charge when we got trapped on P2X887, we'd be dead now probably. HE wouldn't have opened the iris for us!"

"Hammond would have… I think you can trust his judgment, and he WILL have a lot to do with who's appointed. It won't be another Bauer… you can be sure of that!"

"General Hammond wanted YOU! We need someone with experience out there to be really effective."

"Hammond didn't have off world experience either… It will be fine!"

"The President wants you in command as well!"

"Trust me, Sam, they'll find someone much better than me!"

"You'll miss being out there."

"I'm not 'out there' now! Except very occasionally. Most of the time I'm stuck at the SGC with paperwork, and you know how much I LOVE paperwork!"

"But you'll still miss the SGC," Sam stubbornly continued.

"I probably will," he conceded, "but I'll find other interests. Hell, I'm going out on a bang. I never expected to make General, but I did and now I get a MUCH better pension than I expected. And anyway I did do SOMETHING that year before my recall. I'll survive! Especially with you in my life… and my bed I hope!" He waggled his eyebrows at her and smiled that special smile which always made her insides melt. But Sam only sighed and nodded her head.

"OK, you win!... for now. But if I think of another way, I'll push for it. I still say the SGC needs you."

"The only thing I want to need me anymore is YOU!"

Finally she did laugh. "Right… and yes I definitely need you!"

His gaze softened and he reached out to her. "C'mere." She sat on the bed away from his bandaged arm, and leaned willingly into his embrace. He hugged her tightly with his good arm, and buried his face into her neck, just as he had a few times before… but this time she felt his lips gently nipping at her neck, and then he pulled back and just looked at her.

"God, I love you," he said softly; and then captured her lips with his own.

…


	7. Resolution

I don't own Stargate SG-1 and its characters:

They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.

I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this;

it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.

* * *

AN:  _Sorry for the delay ~ hope to get the next part up quicker ~ Enjoy_

* * *

Spoilers for Reckoning Part I; Reckoning Part II; Threads

* * *

...

**Chapter Seven - Resolution**

Jack recovered very quickly from his ordeal, and the doctors were very pleased with his progress and released him home on the following day. Sam took two weeks leave and went to stay with him at his house to make sure he rested and didn't use his arm too soon. She stayed in his spare room though, and they kept their interactions as platonic as they could

They had both decided that after waiting so long, they could wait a little longer. They hadn't flaunted regulations in all the years they had served together, whatever some people thought, and starting now, so close to them being actually 'legal', seemed stupid and pointless. Jack sent off his second actually posted resignation of his career, and Sam continued to puzzle over a way for them both to stay at the SGC.

They were both due to the SGC together. Jack would be on light duty only, but he said sitting at a desk would hardly be a hardship. He was antsy and appeared very happy to be getting back, if only temporarily. Sam argued that it proved he needed to still be in the USAF and especially the Stargate program, but Jack countered that after he properly left, it would be different because he could start doing other things he didn't have time for at the present time.

The day before the return day, Jack received a notification from General Hammond to attend at the SGC, and he also requested that Sam come to the meeting as well. Hammond had returned to the SGC temporarily while Jack was out sick, and it was with a sense of  _deja-vu_  that they approached Jack's office and saw their old C.O. sitting there.

The General smiled at them both and after checking how Jack was feeling after his accident, asked for them to come into the briefing room, where they found Paul sitting waiting for them. Hammond started the meeting without preamble as soon as they were seated.

"The President is not prepared to accept your resignation, Jack."

"With all due respect, Sir, he can't do that. I have very valid reasons, and I…!"

"I know the reasons, Jack. Colonel Davis has filled me in."

Jack scowled over at Paul. "Has he now, well…" but Hammond interrupted him again.

"Just hear us out please Jack, and if you still want to resign when we have finished, then I will give due consideration, and I will ensure the President does as well." Jack pursed his lips and then nodded.

"OK, fair enough. But if it involves Carter resigning instead of me, then…"

Hammond sighed. "Just listen, Jack. I assure you Colonel Carter is too valuable to lose as well." Getting another nod from Jack, he turned to Paul and said, "Colonel, as this is your idea, perhaps you would like to explain it."

"Well, I thought of this because of the way I am posted to the mountain. I work as a liaison to the Pentagon, and fulfill diplomatic duties with regards to our off-world allies and new contacts, but although I mainly work out of the SGC, I am separate from the Command, and report directly to General Hammond at Homeworld Security. I suggested to the General that perhaps Colonel Carter could assume a very similar role, but with scientific duties as opposed to diplomatic, and also report directly to General Hammond. This would place her outside the chain of command at the SGC."

"I saw merit in this suggestion and put it forward to the President with a strong recommendation that we put it into place. Therefore, Colonel Carter,please accept a posting with immediate effect as a liaison to Area 51 with your main responsibilities being to oversee all investigation and development of alien technology and then to decide to which area they need to go to be developed further. You will be attached to the SGC for the majority of your time and will report directly to me at Homeland Security. Your duties will occasionally merit off-world duty attached to various teams but mainly SG-1 and will also require two to three days per month spent at Area 51 to ascertain progress."

"So…" said Jack slowly. "Carter will still be based here, but will not be in my Command?"

"Exactly, General. And this also means that as you are in different commands, you are free to pursue a relationship with each other."

"Sweet!"

…

General Hammond went into a little more detail with Sam and then asked her to report to his office in Washington the following week in order to go into more detail on her new duties. In the meantime, he asked her to assess her lab and requisition any new equipment she believed would be beneficial to her new job. He said he was finishing things up and returning to Washington that evening. Jack and Sam took their leave after thanking Hammond and of course Paul, and returned to Jack's house to finish up the last day of leave. All the way down the mountain they were both silent and deep in their own thoughts, but the truck was filled with an expectant excitement. As they entered Jack's house, Sam couldn't hold it in any longer, and she stopped in the middle if the room. Turning to look Jack straight in the eye, she spoke to him breathlessly.

"So…"

"So…"

"We're both still in the Air Force."

"And at the SGC… For the most part."

"But NOT in the same chain of command!"

"Mmm… that's true. Maybe we should think about getting back in the same chain though."

"What?!"

"On a personal basis only… a small chain of two!"

"And just who would be the superior officer?"

"Well, perhaps we should take it in turns? What d'you think?" he raised his eyebrows and peered down at her.

"I think I like that idea," she said with a small smile. As he returned the smile with a smirking grin, she softly added, "I want…"

"What do you want?" he said just as softly. She considered him silently for a few moments and then continued,

"Take me to your room and I'll show you."

"Ooh, Colonel, I just love it when you take command! Come on let's go… I can't wait for my personal presentation!" She smirked at him and then took his arm and led the way to his bedroom.

…

The next few months were some of the best of her life for Sam. She reveled in her job which gave her all the time she wanted to look at new technology found off-world, without it being whipped out of her control to Area 51. Even when it was moved, she had a great deal of control over what then happened to it, under her new responsibilities with regards to Area 51 itself. The icing on the cake was that she still went through the gate from time to time usually attached to SG-1, renewing and building old and new bonds with Daniel, Teal'c, Cam Mitchell and her protégée Jennifer Hailey.

Having a dream job meant her working life was, for the most part, perfect , and as if that was not enough, when she went home things were even better. The freedom to finally be with Jack in the way she had wanted for so long, even more than she had ever let herself admit, meant that her home life was damn near perfect as well. They had occasional arguments, but any disagreements meant they then had make-up sessions which were phenomenal, adding a spice to an already wonderful sex life.

So all in all, Sam was living in a bubble of near ecstasy when her wayward Dad finally resurfaced, bringing news of the start of the deadliest battle they had possibly ever faced, even more dangerous to the Earth perhaps, than when Anubis attacked and Jack saved them all with the weapon in Antarctica.

The Replicators were coming and on the way they had launched an all-out attack on the Goa'uld. If the Goa'uld couldn't stop them, the Replicators would easily overrun the Milky Way Galaxy in a matter of weeks. And as the Asgard had not been able to completely stop them, the chances that the Goa'uld could were slim indeed.

Close behind Jacob's arrival, Thor also appeared and offered the Asgard's help to try to defeat the Replicators. They were very conscious that they had made Earth known to the Replicators by asking for SG-1's help in the first place. Sam and Thor started to work together to try to work out a way to disrupt them.

…

Teal'c and Bra'tac then approached Jack and told him they were going to use Ba'al's absence and distraction to attack a sacred temple he held. O'Neill asked them why seizing that temple was so important when they faced such a big threat from the Replicators. Together they explained.

"The temple at Dakara is sacred to all Jaffa."

"It is rich in historical significance. Legend tells it is the place where Anubis rose from the dead."

"It is also the site of the first Prim'ta ritual."

"It is that rite of passage that has bonded us in servitude, ever since. For thousands of years the Jaffa have viewed Dakara as the holiest of sites, the very cradle of our existence. It is the place where the Goa'uld first gave Jaffa their strength and longevity."

"And you really think this place is going to make a difference?"

"Seizing control of the temple there would prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Goa'uld do not possess the power of the Gods."

"Even the most stubborn Jaffa would have to question his loyalty to the Goa'uld."

"Listen to me, O'Neill. This war must be fought on two fronts. We will re-ignite the uprising and conquer our oppressors, while you find the means to stop these Replicators. Let us each fight the enemy we know best."

…

Jack was determined to give them the time they needed; and this led to a disagreement with Jacob, who while still hating the Goa'uld and all they were, also saw the Replicators as even worse. He wanted to warn Ba'al of who they were really facing and advise him to withdraw. Jack was worried this would then give Ba'al the chance to destroy the Jaffa before they had a chance to win.

The use of the Replicator disruptor, that Sam and Thor had developed, worked at first on the few Replicator ships they had tried it on; but then they had adjusted and it no longer worked. Thor barely had time to beam Sam back down to the SGC, before he rapidly accelerated to try to lead them away.

And then came the biggest surprise of all, when Ba'al's hologram appeared through the gate. Despite the threat they were all facing, O'Neill couldn't deny himself the satisfaction of mocking the Goa'uld who had repeatedly tortured him.

"I am aware that you assisted the Asgard."

"Yes?"

"I wish to know what means you possess to fight the scourge?"

"I'm sorry; we must have had a bad connection there for a second. It almost sounded like you were asking me for help."

"The Replicators are a threat to everyone, including the countless humans who populate worlds throughout this galaxy. Now, I propose that we work together, to defeat our common enemy."

"My, this is an occasion. You know that bitter taste in your throat? It's kind of wrapped around your uvula? That's what's left of your pride."

"Perhaps you could curb your amusement for a moment."

Ba'al went on to tell them that he had learned of a hidden weapon on Dakara, which had been built by the Ancients, and was capable of destroying the Replicators. The problem was it would also destroy all other corporeal life in the galaxy. As the Ancients were non-corporeal it would not destroy them, and this probably included the partially ascended Anubis. He wanted O'Neill and his people to find and destroy the weapon before he got back to Dakara.

Ba'al would never admit he was frightened of another Goa'uld, but the hidden subtext in what he was saying was that Anubis wanted the weapon used and was sending Ba'al back to reclaim Dakara from the Jaffa, who had just managed to defeat the few troops left there by Ba'al, while he and the majority of his forces were fighting the Replicators. Anubis wouldn't hesitate to use it, thinking that he could then reseed the galaxy with peoples stolen from other galaxies, and thereby giving him a Replicator free galaxy filled with people who would worship him.

However as one of the beings who WOULD be destroyed by the weapon, Ba'al was obviously not in favor of its use, but could not destroy it himself because then Anubis would know. If the weapon was already destroyed before reaching Dakara then he could just tell Anubis he had not arrived in time. He was coming to Dakara to attack the Jaffa, but was certainly coming a lot more slowly than he could.

Jack hated doing something that Ba'al wanted but he knew they had to find a way to destroy the weapon before Anubis used it on the galaxy. The biggest problem, as Sam pointed out, was that the weapon was hidden, and before they could destroy it, they would have to find it. Being Ancient, it was probably protected by a shield, which meant that bombing the temple, or even the whole planet with nuclear weapons would probably not destroy the weapon.

As those best able to decipher hidden messages and then to work out how to destroy the weapon, Sam and her father went to Dakara, hoping they would also enlist Teal'c's help.

…

Sam and Jacob DID manage to find the weapon, and Jacob also discovered a way to change it so that it only destroyed the Replicators. Reluctantly they enlisted Ba'al's help to send the signal through all of the gates simultaneously so that all of the Replicators were destroyed at once, denying them the ability to adapt to the weapon.

They were down to the last minutes, but they got it to work, and the Replicators were destroyed. The Jaffa were also victorious. Ba'al unfortunately escaped, but his troops were turned, and the Jaffa were finally free. As for Anubis they discovered a little later that Oma Desala could no longer stomach his treachery and destruction, and she turned on him, locking him into an endless battle where neither can win, but both were locked in for eternity. The galaxy was safe from Anubis at last.

…

With the remnants of the Goa'uld dominance in shreds, the Replicators defeated, and the Jaffa free, the SGC entered a state of relative calm. The missions were either exploratory or diplomatic, and Paul was kept especially busy. Sam started to look to the future, one she was eagerly anticipating, and she realized that she had many of the answers she had been searching for. She decided it was time to tell Jack about their search for him and what she had discovered in his study.

They needed to move on and build the life she was sure they both wanted; a life together and with a family. Their time together since the abduction had been wonderful, but she knew they had skirted around some issues and not talked about them. Their overdue conversation could be put off no longer. It was time…

…


	8. Answers Found

I don't own Stargate SG-1 and it's characters:

They are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions.

I'm just borrowing their characters for a while to play; I am not making any money from this; it's just to freeshare with my ff friends.

* * *

_I am sorry sorry sorry that this has taken so long. My new job just took over my life! Anyway settled in now so SHOULD hopefully have time to write. This last part has been ready a week or so, but I cannot find my beautiful beta, Kate, and I didn't want to hold it back any longer! So any glaring mistakes are all mine, and sorry if there are any Englishisms that have crept in there._

_I really hope you enjoy this last part of the story, and that it was worth the wait. Let me know_

* * *

Minor Spoilers for 'The Broca Divide'; Heroes II; Fragile Balance

* * *

Chapter Eight: Answers Found

...

One Friday night shortly following the defeat of the Replicators, Jack arrived home from work to a quiet, lights muted house, and no trace of his lover. He knew she'd left before him, as he'd had paperwork to complete, so he took out his phone to ring her and find out where she was. As he did so, it suddenly beeped with a message from her…

'On the roof… Join me?'

He climbed the ladder and found her sitting, quietly drinking a beer, and gazing expectantly at the top of the ladder, for him to appear.

"Hey." He spoke as he walked towards her.

"Hey, you."

She offered him a beer, which he looked at silently for a moment and then took. It was unlike Sam to be up on the roof alone. She liked to go for a run when she wanted to think anything through, whereas the roof was usually his domain. He was starting to get anxious about what was going on, and as he sat down opposite her, he gave a forced laugh and said, "You stealing my gig?"

She gave him a soft smile and slight shake of her head, saying "We need to talk."

Those dreaded words! When Sara had said those words to him, he had shut her out and ignored them, but he couldn't do that this time. The last few months with Sam had seemed like a dream come true, but he had always had the feeling, deep down, that reality would come to slap him in the face eventually. She was accomplished and beautiful, and intelligent. Why would she want a dumb idiot like himself? OK well maybe not totally dumb, but he sure didn't have her genius and besides he was over a decade older than her. She could do so much better. He gave a deep sigh.

"It's OK, Sam. I knew you'd come to your senses eventually. The last little while has been amazing, and I wouldn't trade it for the world… the universe! He laughed and then sobering added "I have no regrets." He looked up at her to see a frown on her forehead, and bewilderment in her eyes.

"You think…? Jack what ARE you talking about?" He stared…

"Well, us. Splitting up." She pursed her lips.

"Jack. I am only going to say this once, so I really need you to take it in, and accept it. I LOVE you. I have loved you for so long I don't know where it started, though I think the reason I chose you when I went Neanderthal wasn't just because you were an Alpha male. You're right! The last few months  _have_  been amazing, and not just for you. You are everything I ever wanted and I would  _never_  choose to throw that away and split up with you."

As she had been speaking she saw joy and relief bloom on his face, but also confusion.

"Then, why? The talk?"

She smiled again, and shook her head slightly.

"Because I'm selfish when it comes to you. And great as it is now, I want even more."

"More?" he breathed

"Yeah. Getting to know Paul has shown me that you have to grab things with both hands when they are offered. He and Janet keeping things just between them meant that they didn't have as much time together as they could have done. He couldn't have lunch with her at the base, for instance, or spend time with her when Cassie was at home. And afterwards he couldn't show his grief or be with us and Cassie. I want everyone to know how I feel about you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and grab every moment we can. I want to be your wife, Jack. I want to make a family with you."

Jack's eyes were shining with unshed tears. All his dreams were coming true and he couldn't believe he deserved them, but he  _was_  going to grab them while he had the chance."

"Well actually… I do want that too. I even have a ring." She was gently nodding at him.

"I know."

"You know?"

"When you were missing, Daniel and I came here to see if there was anything to show where you might be. I found your box… my box; well it had my name on it anyway. I'd come to recognize that a life with Pete wasn't going to work and had ended things with him, and I was hoping that I hadn't completely destroyed any feelings you had for me, but until I found that box I didn't realize quite how much I had hurt you. I sat there on the floor crying and praying I'd be able to make it up to you."

"Sweetheart, you have never had anything to make up to me for. We both put the SGC ahead of what we wanted; that wasn't all on you. When you accepted Pete I was glad you'd found your happy ending. I'd had a chance at a marriage and family. What I wanted with you was secondary to knowing you were happy. Of course I'm really REALLY happy that you decided your happy ending would be with me instead of Pete. I love you, Sam… so much."

Sam's eyes were filled with tears now as well, but she took a breath and then smirked at him.

"So get to it, General. I want my proposal and my ring!"

He laughed, jumped to his feet, and then went down on his knees before her, wincing as they creaked.

"You sure you want this old crock?"

She swatted his hand, giving him a mock glare and then laughed back at him.

"Stop stalling."

"Oh..kay… Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter would you do me the inestimable honor of becoming my wife?"

"Yes."

"Yes?"

"Definitely yes. With a cherry on top!"

They laughed joyously and their lips met in a passionate kiss. They parted finally to take breath and Jack tried to stand and groaned as his knees wouldn't cooperate.

"Give me a minute and I'll go get your ring."

She laughed again and then stood and pulled him to his feet.

"I've got a better idea. Why don't we go get it together, and then after it's on my finger, we'll be able to celebrate properly. It's a bit cold up here for copulation!"

He smirked and then caught her lips again with a quick kiss.

"Why Colonel. I always did say you were a genius."

…

The following week was a whirlwind for Sam. They had decided on a date only a couple of months away, and although the wedding was only going to be small, there was still an awful lot to do. However, unlike the last wedding she had been planning, this one she was excited about, and she was amazed at how much she had achieved already in that single week, and all without letting any of her own work suffer.

So a week later, it was Friday again, and Sam was arranging fittings for her wedding dress and Cassie's bridesmaids dress from a company who created made to measure garments to your style and material choice. Jack had arranged a barbecue to celebrate their engagement on the next day with SG-1, Paul and Cassie and also General Hammond who was in Colorado Springs visiting his family. She planned to talk to Cassie then and discuss what kind of dress she would like. She stopped and smiled for a moment, imagining her walk down the aisle with Jacob and trailed by Cassie, and then caught her breath on a sob as sadness washed over her.

There should have been TWO attendants following her, not just one. Janet had always been a champion of her feelings for Jack, consoling her and trying to encourage her to find a way to be with him. How ever many times Sam explained to her that it could never be, Janet would just give her a soft smile and say that maybe one day things would be possible. And now it was, and her dear friend,  _their_  dear friend was not here to see it. Sam had found the biggest answer to her own happiness and future, but sadly Janet never would.

Jack found her there, and when she told him why she was upset, he took her in his arms to comfort her. The sadness washed over him too. Janet had been a special friend to them all.

"She should be here," Sam hiccupped. "It's just not fair."

"I know, babe. I know. Sometimes it just doesn't make sense. But you know she'd be so happy for us, and I think a part of her will be there. She always will be."

Sam gave him a watery smile and then buried herself deeper into his arms, thankful that she could.

…

The next morning as they were getting ready for the barbecue, Jack got a call from the mountain to say that Thor had arrived and needed to speak to him urgently.

"Oh, no! What now?"

"Don't worry. I'll call you as soon as I know."

"Shall we cancel?"

"No, everything's ready and we've got the food. I'm sure Cam or Paul would barbecue if I'm not back in time. We're celebrating our engagement, and I refuse to put it on hold for any longer, whatever the universe is throwing at us now."

"OK, but hurry back and let me know."

"Promise." And he kissed her and left.

…

Everyone had arrived and Cam had the barbecue fired up. Wine and laughter was flowing around them, and all they needed now was the groom.

"Thor does have a habit of grabbing Jack at inopportune moments, doesn't he?" Daniel observed to an antsy Sam.

"I can't understand why he hasn't called yet? He promised to let me know straight away and that was hours ago."

"Do not worry, Samantha Carter, he will be here. O'Neill does not let people down." As Teal'c was speaking, Daniel looked up and saw Jack just coming around the side of the house with a beaming smile decorating his face.

"No he doesn't," he said. "Here he is." Sam gave a relieved smile and hugged Jack to her, as he reached them.

"Where have you been? You said you'd phone."

"Sorry," he said breathlessly. "The news was just too good for a phone call. I need to show you… Oh damn, I've left it in the car. Paul would you go and get it for me? It's on the back seat. Here are the keys."

"Yeah, sure. What is it."

"You'll know when you see it."

"Kay. Be right back."

Jack observed him going for a moment, still with that massive smile on his face, and then looked at an impatient Sam as she spoke to him again.

"Jack. What is going on? You're being very mysterious."

"Yeahsureyabetcha. I know. But this is huge… ginormous. The best surprise ever!" His joy was infectious and Sam couldn't help smiling and laughing with him.

"So tell us… What?!"

"Kay, folks. Gather round becauseI have some earth-shattering news. Cam come here. The food won't burn in a couple of minutes, the barbe will be fine. OK folks, here's the thing. Thor has just come to tell me that Loki had a partner when he was cloning; name of Iduna. She was on another ship and when Loki got caught , she dumped the stasis pods onto a nearby planet so she wouldn't be caught too. She intended to come back for them later, and after Thor discovered this he followed her and found them."

"So are these people OK?"

"Yep, they're fine. Thor has swapped most of them back, but there were a couple where the clones had already died so he had a bit of a problem and that's what I've been doing with him. There are two people now at the SGC, that we need to work out how they can return to their lives, but the third one… well that one's a bit easier. Seems I wasn't the only person at the SGC with the ancient gene."

"Jack… what are you..?" Sam was interrupted by Cassie who had spotted Paul rounding the side of the house, his arm tightly round another person tucked close into his side.

"Mom!" and she took off at a run. They all spun to look, and Sam's hand flew to her mouth as most of those around her gave gasps of amazement and pleasure. Even Teal'c had tears in his eyes.

"It was a clone who died saving Wells. Janet was in stasis." Jack said softly.

Sam put her hand on his chest, took in a heaving breath and said, "You're right, Jack. The best surprise ever!" She dropped a quick kiss onto his smiling lips and then ran after her goddaughter to welcome her dear friend home.

…

The barbecue to celebrate the engagement of Sam Carter and Jack O'Neill would have always been a joyous event, but when it morphed into a welcome home party for someone unquestionably missed by everyone who knew her at the SGC it became a downright glorious and unforgettable experience for all who attended.

Janet was overcome by how much time had passed. She had gone to bed one night and then woken on a strange planet by the Asgard on what she thought was the next day. Although she had realized something had happened, she had been unaware of the long period of time, and at first had simply worried that Cassie had been told she was missing. When she was told she had been in stasis for more than a year she was amazed she was still alive. And then she had worried for the pain of her nearest and dearest, especially after discovering her clone had been killed by the Goa'uld. But thanks to Paul, she still had her home, and she delighted in the close relationship he had built with Cassie. Paul could hardly bear to have her out of his arms for even a moment, and it was clear to everyone present that another wedding would be on the cards very soon after the O'Neill/Carter one.

Shortly after Janet's arrival, Jacob also arrived having received an invitation from Jack, and Sam basked in having  _everyone_  she loved with her for this glorious occasion. The party went on long into the night. Cam and Jennifer had left. And also General Hammond had returned home to his family, but everyone else had settled in. They wanted to savor having a dear friend too long missing back with them again. There was a lot of laughter, some tears of joy, and even a few somber moments as they filled Janet in on all she had missed 'while you were sleeping' as Cassie had dubbed it with a laugh.

The night was pleasant and warm and they all opted to stay outside, in the yard. Sam sat in front of Jack, leaning back into his arms and against his chest. The conversation was still flowing around them, although softer now in deference to the late hour. Cassie had fallen asleep with her head resting on her mother's lap; and Janet herself was leaning back into Paul's arms in a very similar pose to Sam herself. Daniel and Teal'c sat between the two couples and Jacob was on her other side.

Sam gave a deep sigh of pleasure and buried herself deeper into Jack's arms. Years before, they had stepped through the gate for the first time searching for the answers to the meaning of life. And she herself had continued searching for those answers for all the years to follow. And now finally she had found them. At least the answers to the meaning of life for her… Janet had been right to say that anything was possible. All the people she loved most in the world were here around her, in the home she shared with the man she had pledged her future to. Her search was complete.

…

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's all folks - as I said hope it was worth the wait. I'm not going to stop writing, but after I have finished Soulmates, there might be break til you get anything more as I AM going to stop posting until a story is all written. Anything else is unfair to all of you.
> 
> I have got a short story in my headin this universe, a sequel of sorts to Secrets, which looks again at Paul and Jan's story, now they have her back. That one should be up fairly soon.
> 
> One more time - Reviews please, lol
> 
> Till the next time...
> 
> Lezzles
> 
> x


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